Welly got Wood

So Wellington is about to construct a garish stamp of 'identity' based around a bad toponymic joke from ten years ago. It could have been worse. The Miramar Cutting may have been re-named Miramax.

Now assuming this isn't the result of some urban planner's pre-Rapture freakout, three possible reasons for Wellywood's erection stand out.

First, John Key horribly mis-understood requests from the last round of Warner Bros execs for a "working environment more like home";

Second, having decided that he can't possibly spin his way around the "100% Pure" fiasco, Key amends NZ's national branding to read "100% Pure Compared to Las Angeles";

or Third, as a small South Pacific Nation with an ill-defined identity, crippling self-esteem issues, and a lingering subconscious need for Superpower validation .. we're trying to ape our new American Big Brother (as opposed to British Colonial Mother). Somewhere, no doubt, Bruce Jesson is turning at sufficient speed in his grave to more than compensate for the wind-farms which were so controversial to build in the hills around the same city.